they say the talking about it helps...

morning.

eyes red again.
puffiness reveal last nights stir.
and uncomfortable veins
occurs.

no apology.

i can't help but desire the kind of man she has.
always attentive...
always caring selflessly.

i'm tired of being silent...
mistreated
abused
accused
hurt
neglected
...
allowing someone else's misery to affect me.

I just want to be able to sleep.

And above all...
I want love.

no one is perfect.
i am def not.
but there are boundaries that should never crossed.
and colder
jaded
lonely...
disgusted
i become everyday.

you know how to fix it...
but you refuse.

for the self is more important to you.


living my game.
i'm tired of death
i rolled around in it for years
thinking i had to accept
it as my
destiny.
it will come...
but inviting it i will not.